Politicians live in Lalaland.

An Open Letter...

Dear Chevy Chase and Dan Aykoyd,
You should make a movie called "High Like Us." You know, like "Spies Like Us," but about being stoned. Actually, I have to confess that I haven't actually seen "Spies Like Us." I only know of its existence due to the recent Family Guy episode in which you both recently guest-starred. (Watch "Spies Reminiscent of Us" at Hulu) The episode was excellent.
I'm too stoned to write this letter any better. So I'll just say this: It would be awesome if there was a movie about the two of you engaging in stoned shenanigans.
Sincerely,
A Growing Fan




Does "A Growing Fan" make any sense at all? It makes sense to me, but that's because I wrote it.

Prose

The Joy of Mango:
The satisfaction one gets from living simply could never be defeated by the numbing comforts of material "ownership."
The peace of mind that comes with a gift of fruit is beyond a tangible value.
Here! Taste this fruit, and know the wonder of what it means to be alive.

SPEAK

I love love love being human with my friends.
Let's be alive together!
I'm cool?????

MARK MEEEEEEEEEE

Some things I have realized

If anyone was going to have sex with a toaster strudel, it should be me. I would give it the best fucking it would have ever gotten in its life. Here's what I'd do:

Take a giant toaster strudel (preferably a raspberry one) and get it to be a little too hot. Then I'd hover over the strudel and pull out two giant packets of the frosting and paint myself and the strudel and roll around in it. This would be the greatest day of my life.

Were you?

I was just thinking...